Eleven Sons

Firstly, I am very drunk.
Secondly, I dont look like a model with big pouty lipas.
Thirdly, I am very beautiful.

Sometimes people dont relaise that they are totaslly beautiful when they really are.
Take my friend Eleven Sons.
He is one of the best people but he doesn't know.
Also he doesnt have eleven sons.

But he has it all.

Eleven Sons is a Jew, therefore he eats as much bacon as possible. He has the curly hair and important nose, and when he puts on a swedish hat and trench coat he looks ghastly. At least he doesnt have the long curly bits. He is the only real Jew I ever met, and also thae only Jew who doesnt know anything about Jerusalem or the Holocaust.

Like anyone like me, Eleven Sons doesnt really care about much history or even current events, he just wants someone to love.
Unfortunately, he just wants a nice quiet girl to love, but everyone thinks that he is gay.
His own mother asked him if he was gay once, and he promptly burst into tears. This confirmed her suspicions.

Eleven Sons is the best of both worlds. Not only is he a hot-blooded man ready to shag most willing females senseless, but he has the sensitivity of a woman. If you are a woman reading this, and that turns you off, wonder why? Women in general spend so much of their time when they fell a man, trying to get him to become more like a woman. I fthe job is already done for you, why should that be bad?

Eleven Sons is looking for a woman, and I tell you, he is virile. But soft. And sharp. But playful. And razor-sharp. And hard, but creamy like a chocolate egg.