Tuesday, September 25, 2007


I went to the strangest planet last week, for the most out of it assignment I have yet been assigned. The brief was as follows:

-Stay in this place for all your awake time, only leave for sleep of the dead. Dont see anyone you know or love.

-Be surrounded by creatures of extreme angularity and tallness, so that their hipbones bump in to your sternum at every turn.

-Clothe and Benakedise these creatures on demand, have their breasts rest on your head, and the shorter creatures' nipples poke you in the eyeballs.

-See breasts all day, wish you were a lesbian for some job satisfaction. As it is just spend the time comparing your own breasts to theirs.

-Eat only small cooked land birds and nothing else at all. Maybe a leaf now and then.

-Be not paid save for the massive props and somewhat monotonous bags of 'goodies'.

-Begin to place unwarranted value on 'goodies', as opposed to the things in life that really matter (?)

-Hoard 'goodies' furtively. Brag to others.

-Be in an environment of extreme fashion, wearing only a sack printed with the word 'idiot'.